Any advice for this teen problem?

My daughter has been harassed by other students for over 10 years. This past week another girl her age got in her face on the school bus spoiling to fight her. My daughter told her she didn't want to fight and the girl called her a terrible name. My daughter snapped and slugged her.


Both girls got suspended off the bus for 3 days. My husband and I agreed with the suspension. We don't agree with fighting but there comes a time that you have to stand your ground. My daughter chose 3 days of In School Suspension so that she could still ride the bus to school. She began the ISS the same day the suspension was given. She hasn't spoke of the incident to anyone.


Today she received a hateful email from this girl. It was full of awful language and threats. Based on her rants, one could tell that this girl is in a bad place mentally.


We want to speak to the mother but our daughter says it will only make harassment worse.


Please I need some advice here. Worried for her safety.Any advice for this teen problem?
My first question is why has this gone on for 10 years?? As a parent who has had a child with similiar experiences, I know that after just a few months my daughter showed signs of stress and depression that affected her...I cant imagine how a child would be feeling after 10 years of this. Please talk to the school imemdiately...show them the emails...so they can be aware of the threat the other child poses to your's. Your daughter's refusing to talk and not wanting to make things worse could be a sign that she feels no one will listen or help anyway, so why even try. I would suggest sending her to a therapist or school counselor, explaining that what she tells them will go no where else and that it is a safe place to talk about all she has been through.





You do need to contact the other child's parents..to make it clear that you will not tolorate their child threatening, spreading rumors or tormenting your child. Make it clear that if it happens again, you will not only report it to the school but to the police. This other girl has clearly never had anyone step up to her and make her accountable. she is old enough now to find out what happens when this sort of thing happens in the real world and her parents need the wake up call. Your job is to protect your child...even if she doesn;t want you to.Any advice for this teen problem?
Her parents are useless, I would print off a copy of the e-mail showing the address it came from and go talk with the Principal about this issue. Your daughter has a right not to be harassed in school. This has to stop. If the principal does nothing go over his head to who ever is in charge of the schools in the grade your daughter attends. If this can not be solved by the school system them explain to them that you will just have to seek a legal remedy to this issue. Like a restraining order against this girl. The school is responsible for your child's safety until she gets home. They need to be held responsible.
well the girls parents obviously know theres a problem... so talking to them would only make matters worse...





I actually agree with your daughter punching her, sometimes people have to learn the lesson the hard way and although right now it may complicate things, in the end it might make it better...





Last fall I was beat up by 10-15 girls, and now I'm friends with every single one of them except 2, who I havent seen since...





A year and a half ago, a friend of mine and I were really mean to this other girl... We teased her, embarassed her, beat her up, ruined her digital camera, and her mom called our parents to try and solve it... Our parents believed us, not her, and thought her mom was nuts... Then we made more fun of her... It made things worse and because of us she had to switch schools... I feel really bad about it now...
1:GO WITH YOUR GIRL TO SCHOOL





2:FIND THE GIRL SHE FOUGHT





3:WORK A PEACE AGGREMENT!
I really doubt the parents are going to do a whole lot. That's the case in a lot of cases...as sad as it is. The best thing to do is print the email off and ask if you can have a meeting with the principal at school, the school counselor and if she's in high school most of the time now a days they have a ';school cop'; that monitors things like harrassment. Your daughter should be able to go to school without being harrassed and what this girl is doing is harrassing her! The girl needs to also be disciplined for the harrassment or it will just keep happening. I really hope this gets worked out. I hate how cruel kids can be to each other. Isn't it just awful. I hope your daughter does have some really good positive friends at school that can help her through all this as well. Best of luck to you and your little girl!
If the mother didn't make her go to the counseling or whatever, then you need to speak to the father. He needs to do something about this, and make sure BOTH of her parents are very well aware that if ANY harm comes to your daughter as a result of their child, you WILL be pressing charges because this harassment has GOT to stop. Your child should not have to live in fear, simply because some other child has some issues.





If you can't get hold of a parent, speak to the guidance counselor at the school on your own. Make it clear how obvious it is that this girl has some psychological issues. Print out the email and show it to them. Tell them that your daughter literally fears for her life, and that this is harming her both physically (it is draining to be worrying like this at a young age) and emotionally and psychologically. Suggest that maybe the counselor could speak to her and then contact the girls' parents to get this under control.





If THAT'S not possible, head directly to the principal and tell him/her the entire story and ordeal. Let them know that you will not put up with your child being harassed by another.





Don't go in ranting and raving. Speak calmly and they are more likely to take you seriously. They don't need another deranged parent in there. They need someone civilized and you have an obligation to your daughter to keep your cool and be there for her.





I wish you the best of luck.
As much as you would like to .. The best thing is not to go on about how this girls home life is... The only thing that might do is make you look bad...That also gives the other person the rights to look into your home life..





Your daughter is sort of right. Going to the girls parents might make things worse for her. But you do need to go to the school. Bring in the emails the girl send your daughter as proof as to what she has said to her.








See what the school can do first and then see what your options are. Changing schools or home school or other things like that if the school is not able to help..





Good Luck.
Print off the email and show it to the school counselor and tell him/her what you know about the girl's history. This is the kind of person every school fears these days. She is very likely victimizing others as well as your child. She needs help asap.